#2: that you

   Today, surprisingly, was a day better than most. And yet, more than most days, I felt adrift. I've learned acutely again and again that it is on the happiest days I miss you most.

 My favourite moment in Avengers was when Hulk (finally) transforms and he says his secret is that he was always angry. I felt I knew him in that moment.

  When I was younger, I could almost always cry on cue. It's not that I could cry when I wanted to, but I think I was always irresistibly moved by the world.

   Even now, when I am sad, it is not that I am saddened by something. The opposite is true - I have always been restraining not to be sad.

   But, this is my real secret, I am happy and sad because of you. Neither of the two can live apart.
   

#1: poetic possibilities

    

     Earlier this week, I bought a set of magnetic words for my office cabinets. I thought it would be fun and useful, since I don't get to write as often as I would like anymore. 

    Whenever I can, I would clear up my table and take out the small metallic box. I would look at the words and imagine, just for a moment, of the poetic possibilities of life. 

  

    Limitations are part of life. This small metallic box only contain so many words - and yet, I have not lived through all their variations. It dawned on me how we often stop trying to live out the many beautiful facets of our lives because we already assume our constraints bind us - when perhaps they are merely the sieve to bring out what is pure and intense inside of us. 

   We are our own poems.